After a quick run down of today’s sports stories, I realized that a lot current and former athletes and coaches could use the positive karma that IS the Fuzzy Cross. So with little form, little thought, and little discretion…I will gladly hand out today’s Fuzzy Crosses:
A large maize and blue Fuzzy Cross to Rich Rodriguez. The Michigan football coach enters his 3rd season at the helm the of recently pathetic program. Old Rich Rod has yet to beat Ohio State or Michigan State in rivalry match-ups. They have lost a combined 16 game in the last two seasons, the most in any two span in school history.
The feeling around the Big Ten is that Rodriguez will need to win at least 7 games this year to keep his job. Good luck with that, Rich. Grab a Fuzzy Cross…you will need it.
My next Fuzzy Cross goes out to Roger Clemens. The most dominant pitcher of his era, Clemens plead not guilty to lying to Congress during the investigation into whether he knowingly used performance enhancing drugs. The 7-time Cy Young Award winner looked as smug as ever as he left the courthouse after a 14 minute hearing. Only 14 minutes for him put his entire reputation and legacy on the line. I don’t know if The Rocket used PEDs or not, but to me, he doesn’t have the look of an innocent man. I have seen this look before. (see Barry Bonds, Mark McGwire, Pete Rose, Bernie Madoff). Get yourself a Fuzzy Cross, Rog…it may be spiritually useful……………in federal prison.
And lastly, my last Fuzzy Cross goes out to Troy Polamalu, the Pittsburgh Steeler safety. And really, the Fuzzy Cross goes out Troy’s hair. Call it a “Fuzzy on Fuzzy” shout-out. According to the Associated Press, Polamalu’s hair has been insured for $1 million by Head and Shoulders. The hard hitting stalwart of the Steeler defense endorses the brand’s shampoo and has made some pretty funny commercials for them. Apparently, some opposing players go after Troy’s mane during the heat of battle. No flowing locks. No commercials for Head and Shoulders. Of course, the insurance was obtained through Lloyd’s of London. This is the same group of stuffy Brits that have insured Tina Turner’s legs, Keith Richard’s fingers, and Jimmy Durante’s nose. I understand the first two, but what could have happened to Jimmy’s nose that could have been worse? So, “cheers, mate!” to Troy and his hair. Get yourself a black and gold Fuzzy Cross and attempt to get it around that head of yours!